Today's The Day

Yesterday saw the launch of a new Village Guide. There I was, eagerly flicking through my first edition, expecting to find pub ratings, photos of communal gardens and bus times - and what did I see? A picture of the new Damien Hertz sculpture that's come our way. It's disgusting! It's outrageous! It shouldn't be allowed.

And then later today we'll be attending the grand launch of 'Recipes Of Wivenhoe' at the Legion, but a mere stone's throw from The Boat For My Potplants. Apparently I have my SEX ON TOAST gourmet delight included, which is equally disgusting, outrageous and definitely shouldn't be allowed.

But it's all in the name of chariddy, and on the best possible toast!

I can't wait.

As they say, you don't have to be bonkers to live here, but it does certainly help.