Meet Rolo

Let me introduce Rolo to you.

She's meant to be a full English Cocker spaniel but Joss, the owner, suspects she may have a bit of dachshund in her or something else!  Joss got her in Dubai, although she was originally from Hungary. And now she lives in Wivenhoe. She's certainly a well-travelled dog.

I've always welcomed pooches on the Boat With A Few Potplants, and Rolo must be at least the tenth canine to set paws on the deck.

And very pleased I was too when she came aboard - after all, I needed to get acquainted with her as she is a central and pivotal character throughout my latest blockbuster, Mister Tap.

Rolo plays herself, and Mister Tap is her master. Or is it the other way round?

WHAT A PAIR

What do I do on the boat once a week, every week, and have been doing so for the last few years?

Well, I'll tell you what I do, what I really really do.

I meet with my publisher, editor, cover designer and good friend David Roberts.

Although we spend most of our time talking blx, we do actually have serious 'Book Club' meetings to discuss how to move forward with whatever our current project at the time is.

Currently it's 'MISTER TAP', to be published 2020.

To help things flow, we take in in turns to bring the wine, or do the food.

Both of us play the sounds.

It's an essential part of the book-writing process. 

NO TIDE

Well, I didn't overcome my fear associated with taking the boat out.

Apart from the threat of poor weather hanging in the air, there was another insurmountable problem to contend with - I had misread the tide height, and it just didn't come up high enough to float us for long enough.

So we went for a meal instead at Wivenhoe's very own Syrian restaurant. Excellent vegan fare, and highly recommended. https://www.theolivebranchwivenhoe.co.uk/

Actually, I was much relieved that I couldn't take the boat out - but it's still on my list of to-do items.

I won't be satisfied until I've done it, but that will have to be next year now.

Overcoming The Fear

It might seem a piece of cake to all you boaty people out there, but not so for me.

But this year is MY year for overcoming my fears.

First off, in May I drove my 51-year-old Fiat to Laon in France to attend a classic car gathering of epic proportions. Previously, I'd not gone much further than to the Co Op in Wivenhoe - and there I was doing a round-trip of around 700 miles.

And I lived to tell the tale.

And now I plan to take out the old Miss Baudet (aka A Boat For My Potplants) at high-tide on 22nd September.

Yes indeed, I'll be firing up that Suzuki 9.9 and easing out onto the River Colne, and setting compass for Rowhedge.

It's a long way, for sure - at least one nautical mile there and back.

I'm shivering me timbers in fright already.

Blimey!

Blimey! What a week it's been.

Jane has been preparing her art exhibition. She's so cool, calm and collected that it didn't seem to faze her one bit.

We've both been preparing our Open Garden on top of Miss Baudet. I hope she doesn't mind! That was less cool, calm and collecting for me. Can you imagine the trauma when I discovered that the original tiger that had been offered, had been sold. But Nellie the Elephant came along instead.
Phew, that was a relief! And then we found a little tiger anyway.

And as well as all that going on, it is with great honour, I find myself welcoming 7 friends from Montolieu, France (including Monsieur le Maire and his wife) to our little town, to see Wivenhoe for the first time, and to attend our own Mayor's Ball this weekend. But these things don't just happen by accident, you know - it takes years of meticulous planning. Well, a few days, at least.

I would never have imagined two years ago, when I sheepishly suggested the idea of a 'town friendship' between Montolieu and Wivenhoe to Monsieur le Maire, that he'd actually be here, with an entourage that includes his wife, the museum curator, a bookshop owner, a restauranteur, an interpreter, and a wineshop owner.

.

C'est fantastique!

Never A Dull Moment

In just a week and a half from now, it will be the Wivenhoe Open Gardens, and I've promised to make a display on the top of my boat. Not only that, Jane will be participating in the Spring Presence art trail.

So, yesterday, not to miss a bargain, in preparation I bought some astroturf from Aldi.

Coinciding with that weekend, a delegation of 7 friends, including the Maire of Montolieu who joined me on stage at my book launch last year, will be coming to visit Wivenhoe to attend our own Mayor's Ball.

In my excitement, I ordered some French flags!

I hope this will be the beginnings of great things to come - of cultural exchange and friendship between our two unusual, friendly, quirky and creative towns.

Elephant Found!

I found an elephant!
And a tiger.
I have the boat.
All I need is a jungle like I had for the gorilla.

Elephant Wanted!

Miss Baudet (the current name for The Boat For My Potplants) went naked, all for the sake of preparation.

When one is invited to take part in this year's Wivenhoe Open Gardens, one must have one's boat spic and span - and that means one must clean the canvas canopy.

This entails one taking it off, pressure-washing it, and putting it back on - unfortunately in gale-force winds.

It wasn't easy, but with thanks to 'Erindoors, one managed it.

Now one has to think up how to turn the boat into a garden.

Last time it was with a gorilla.

This year, especially as Nellie the dwarf twin elephant in 'Mister Tap' is fresh in one's mind, one is now in search of a Nellie-lookalike.

And, as the Maire of Montolieu MIGHT be visiting that weekend, one wants to put on a good display.

So, if anyone has one to lend one, do let one know.

Ta very much.

Spice of Life

 I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want.

The boat is coming back to life, with the recent addition of a secondhand record player I recently bought.

However, in this day and age of modern technology, I really ought to go all bluetooth so that I don't drain the battery after having the amplifier on for half an hour.

So, all I have to do is rustle up a few crisp tenners and buy myself what I really really want.

I want two Minirigs speakers and a bluetooth turntable by Audio Technica.

The speakers are amazing. I wonder if they'll give me a couple if I ask politely.

No, probably not.


So, my finger keeps hovering over the 'BUY NOW' button on Amazon.

My heart says 'press', but after looking at my Barclaycard statement, my head say's 'don't'.

Caterpillar

In the name of research, I went round to wildlife expert Chris, who happens to live nearby, to ask him all about the Processionary Caterpillar.

Why, you may ask?

Fair question.

Well, it's all because Sebastian from the Casquette et Chapeau has a stick thrown at him by Mister Tap, according to my latest multi-singular blockbuster 'Mister Tap', currently under construction.

The stick missed its target, but unfortunately hit the nest of deadly caterpillars hanging from the branch above Seb's head.

Oh dear! Unfortunately for Seb, the inhalation of the micro-hairs from the little creatures could be fatal.

What on earth might happen? Will he be saved, just in time?

I dunno. I haven't written it yet.

Demises

I'm currently hard at work, plotting Mister Tap, and how the various characters meet their demises, which they surely must do.

And then there's also the staircase, and the cupboard at the bottom.

There are only three people who know what's in it.

And I'm one of them.

In Montolieu

Last week I was lucky enough to be in Montolieu, at the Writer's Retreat, doing some more 'Mister Tap'.

What a bloody horrible week it was.

I had a cough, I had a cold, I had a bad back, the weather was shit, 'Erindoors had to cancel coming at the last minute, and my cooking ain't wot it oughta be, as can be seen by my sauce that went slightly wrong.

Oh yes, and the car had a flat battery, twice - the first time when I arrived, and the second time just before going to the airport.

Apart from all that, it was great!

But I did manage to complete the current 20 chapters, and that's what I set out to do.

And I also had a very successful meeting with Monsieur Maire (not Monsieur le Mairie - Mr Town Hall, as I mistakenly called him at last summer's book launch), and I think because of the lure of having apperos on my boat, he may be coming to Wivenhoe in May.

He will be most welcome.

We Have Lights, We Have Heat, We Have Liftoff

Miss Baudet is coming back to life as a Writer's Retreat. The solar panel works a treat, and even though it was nut-freezing weather outside, inside was warm and toastie.

The Minnesota Mousse, thanks to good friend Katie from the US, was well-placed.

The first Book Club of 2019 aboard the Wivenhoe Writer's Retreat On The Mud went very well for publisher David and me, with fish and chips from up the lane, and creative juices flowing as freely as the wine.

So many ideas, they were brimming over.